Is a family member or friend feeling depressed? Don’t criticize them or give them unsolicited advice. Learn the right way to cheer someone up.
Your friend or loved one may have had a hard day at work and are feeling down. Even if it’s not a work-related issue, a personal event such as a bad breakup or fight with a loved one may bring you down. You don’t want to just stand there and put your loved one through the pain. Thinking about the bond you have with that person allows you to connect with them and feel better about them. Supporting someone who is feeling down can make a big difference. It can boost their confidence and brighten their mood. However, it is not always possible to say or do the right things. Don’t worry. You can always learn how to cheer someone up and make them feel better.
How can you tell if someone is feeling depressed?
“Family and friends often notice that someone is feeling sad through subtle changes in someone’s behavior or habits,” says psychologist Vandita Sharma. If you want to learn how to cheer someone up, start by paying attention to the signs of a low mood.
- Looks low or far away.
- You become easily irritated or your mood fluctuates easily.
- They talk less or become unusually quiet.
- Eating just for the sake of it or showing little interest in the meals they once enjoyed.
- She is not dressed or groomed as well as usual.
- Avoiding social interactions or separating yourself from family and friends.
- Does not respond enthusiastically to conversations or plans.
- You no longer find joy or happiness in activities you once loved.
- I spend a lot of time doomscrolling and mindlessly scrolling through my phone.

How to cheer someone up: What to avoid
Timely encouragement from loved ones can prevent low mood from worsening into serious emotional problems. “Also, genuine gestures of help and support can help restore confidence and fight negative thoughts,” say experts. However, when learning how to cheer someone up, avoid the following:
- minimize their emotions: Avoid saying things like, “You just have to get over it” and “It’s not that big of a deal or that big of a deal.” When learning how to cheer someone up, be careful not to use these sentences. Because they can make you feel invalid.
- give unwanted advice: Refrain from offering solutions to problems unless you specifically ask for help.
- ignore their feelings: Don’t pressure them to stay positive or minimize their struggles.
- judge their actions: If you criticize or criticize, you may retreat further into your shell.
- use insensitive humor: Making me laugh makes me feel better. Be careful not to make jokes that hurt the other person’s feelings or situation.
How to cheer someone up?
Would you like to help your loved one feel better and lift their spirits? Next, learn how to cheer someone up.
1. Listen actively
Giving your loved one your full attention is an even more powerful act of empathy. Remember this when learning how to cheer someone up. “When someone is feeling down, they need to be heard. Avoid interrupting and instead use active listening techniques like nodding, maintaining eye contact, and asking clarifying questions,” experts suggest. This shows that you value their feelings and are genuinely interested in understanding their point of view.
2. Remind yourself of your strengths
When someone is feeling down, it’s easy to forget their positive qualities. Remind them of their past successes, their unique talents, and the challenges they have overcome over the years. “This helps boost their self-esteem and reminds them of their strength. Positive affirmations can also be helpful in this regard,” says Sharma.
3. Give a compliment
Praising others has a positive influence on others, but many people cannot praise others easily. According to a 2021 study published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, people typically don’t engage in these prosocial behaviors because they incorrectly assess the value of compliments they receive from others. “But a compliment given sincerely can brighten someone’s day,” experts say. When learning how to cheer someone up, remember that compliments don’t have to be exaggerated or extravagant. Something simple and authentic goes a long way. Focus on specific traits or behaviors that you admire about your loved one. This will help them feel not only appreciated but also valued.
4. Think from their perspective
Try to understand their situation from their perspective rather than imposing your solutions and advice. As part of learning how to cheer someone up, try to understand what they are feeling and what they need right now. Sometimes you just need a listening ear or a comforting presence. Put yourself in their shoes and respond with empathy and understanding.
5. Spend quality time together
Quality time is a precious gift you can give to your loved ones. Remember this when learning how to cheer someone up. So, engage in activities that your child enjoys, such as a hobby you both are interested in, a walk in nature, or just sitting together in silence. Your presence alone can give them the comfort and support they need.

6. Help with tasks
Relieving someone of a small burden can greatly reduce stress. As part of learning how to cheer someone up, offer to help with chores, errands, or other tasks that may be burdening them. This simple act of kindness can show that you care and are willing to help.
7. Create a distraction.
Sometimes a little distraction is enough to lift a person’s mood. Involve them in fun or light-hearted activities, such as playing games or watching funny movies. Distraction should be part of how you cheer someone up, as it helps shift focus away from negative thoughts and feelings.
8. Make me laugh
Laughter is a powerful tool that boosts your mood and reduces stress. Remember this when learning how to cheer someone up. According to research published in 2016 in the Tohoku Journal of Experimental Medicine, it has a positive impact not only on your immune system but also on your mental health. Share funny stories, jokes, and memes with someone who’s in a bad mood. A good laugh brightens your mood and brings a smile to your face.
9. Surprise someone with a thoughtful gesture
A small unexpected gesture can show someone you care. Giving someone a handwritten note can make them feel special, especially in the digital age. You can also surprise them with their favorite treat or dessert, or a small gift to brighten their day and make them feel loved as well as special.
10. Encourage self-care
As you learn how to cheer someone up, remind them that self-care is essential to their mental and emotional well-being. “Gently encourage them to take part in relaxing activities, like taking a bath, reading a book, or doing yoga,” say experts.
11. Give words of encouragement
Want to learn how to cheer someone up? Positive affirmations and words of encouragement can go a long way, so think about it. Reassure your loved one of their abilities and remind them that they are not alone, even with pain and hardship.
12. Get it moving
Physical activity lifts your mood and reduces stress. So when learning how to cheer someone up, focus on the importance of exercise. Encourage them to walk, run, or do other forms of exercise. According to a 2017 study published in Brain Plasticity, exercise can help reduce mood and symptoms associated with psychological disorders such as depression and anxiety. “Endorphins released during physical activity can help improve your overall mood and outlook,” experts say.
13. Use music to boost your mood
Music helps soothe and lift your mood. So cherish the music while learning how to cheer someone up. You can create a playlist for your loved one and have them listen to it when they’re feeling down. The UK’s National Health Service recommends starting with slower songs and moving to faster, uplifting songs.
It’s not always easy to do the right thing when a loved one is depressed. Learning how to cheer someone up is important. However, avoid forcing yourself to think positively or ignoring your emotions. Doing so can make the other person feel invalidated.
Related FAQ
How can I encourage someone from a distance?
Send a playlist of fun songs to cheer up a friend far away. Handwritten messages take longer to arrive, but they can make someone feel special. If you want to have a little fun, share some funny videos with your friends.
How can you cheer someone up over the phone?
Talk to a friend or partner about how you’re feeling, offer support, and ask them to send you words of encouragement. Thanks to technology, you can also use your phone to record messages and send voice notes to encourage someone over the phone.